Why are my kids always so dirty?

  Before I had kids, I'd go to other people's houses and take a long look at their kids.  It seemed to me that every kid under the age of 5 always had boogers running down their nose, a grimy face, and yesterday's lollipop residue still on their hand.  I was critical of the parents of these kids, thinking that if I were to ever have a kid, sure, my kids would get grimy and sticky.  BUT, I'd be on top of things.  I'd clean up their messes quickly, before things got out of hand.  My kid would never be seen in public or around other people  in such raggedy condition.  After all, how hard could it be to keep a kid relatively clean?

  Well, let me tell you something.  Kids are a mess.  They LOVE being dirty and gravitate towards grime.  If there is one mud puddle in the yard, they will immediately find it and jump in it over and over.  When they pick a lollipop, it will inevitably be blue.  And that blue will drip down their cute little chin and down onto the clothes right before you have to leave for the store.  Then, they will use their hands (which will be covered with blue lollipop grime), to pick up rocks in the parking lot.  When you tell them to stop, they will wipe their hands on their clothes.  It never ends.  None of this is an exaggeration.  No, this is really how life is with kids.

  Case in point:  This afternoon, the kids were bored.  Since it was warm and beautiful outside, I thought about our sprinkler.  I could put on their bathing suits and let them play in the water.  Of course, I immediately realized the fact that the sprinkler produces muddy ground.  So, I used my brain.  I got out a piece of tarp from the shed to put under the sprinkler.  That way, they could slide and jump on the tarp, while getting wet and avoiding muddy feet.  Boy, was I ever wrong.

  They completely avoided the tarp and focused on the mud that the sprinkler created right on the side of the tarp.  And I mean really focused.  They sat in the mud, jumped in it. threw it at each other, filled buckets with the stuff, and dumped it onto the tarp.  They were filthy, filthy, filthy.

  I actually brought a bar of soap outside and used the hose and soap to try to get the bulk of mud off of them while they were still outside.  Then I used towels to scoop up the kids and get them in the bathroom and into the tub.  It was awful.

  After this whole ordeal, I had to bathe two kids, wash the hair of two kids, run a load of laundry, clean the bathtub, clean the sink, and I still need to sweep and mop.  If I EVER EVER mention to anyone of you out their that I might get out the sprinkler and let the kids play in it on any given day, please refer me to this post. I think that my kids are still too young to play in the sprinkler.  Maybe I'll try again in a few years.